Some Good News

Tillandsia — air plant — surrounded by beloved super heroes. The purple protuberances emanating from the plant are real! My source says that an air plant flowers once in its lifetime. Glad I was around to notice! A day or so after I snapped this photo, the blooms had faded.

Before I dive into my good news, I want to provide a COVID update. Alas, I am still sick with upper respiratory symptoms and a positive test result. I guess I shouldna declared victory so early in my Bun demands relief from the heat post. It seems bad and unfair that I am still sick. I am 13 days in and while not feeling awful, I’m still uncomfortable enough much of the time. Did the Paxlovid help avert more dire consequences? We will never know! Did the Paxlovid cause a bad mouth taste? Bonus diarrhea (something every colitis sufferer loves to hear)? Yes and yes!

The real unfortunate consequence is the interruption of my wound care. I rely on weekly clinic visits for the surgeon to scrape off the fibrotic tissue that grows on the wound bed and prevents new skin from growing in on the edges to eventually close the wound. The wound size is still 6x7cm of open tissue (read “skinless, uncovered, and at risk for infection”). Tomorrow is my one-year anniversary of the bacterial attack on my leg. My body has made a brave effort at closing the wound from its original 22x17cm size, but I would rather be celebrating this as a distant memory, not a condition I’m still managing. So.

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But there’s good news on the cancer front

It’s all a bit of a rollercoaster: super good news last fall to oops a suspicious nodule in March to everything looks stable in June.

From the June 11 radiologist’s report:

LUNGS:

* Right apex, image 14/series 3, 6 mm; Prior Size: 6 mm; Status: Stable;

* Previously noted nodular density in the lingula has resolved as has a cluster of nodules in the right upper lobe.

I’m pleased and relieved, not breaking out the champagne just yet. Oncologist scheduled the next scan in 3 months, “just to keep an eye on things.”

Truth: How much can staying in the moment do?

Will I ever celebrate a complete recovery? It’s complicated. As I noted in my tyranny article, I’m beginning to come to terms with what it means to live with a chronic disease. Of course I’m thrilled that this latest scan is a good one. I’m also aware that the scan is a moment in time. Knowing myself fairly well, the best course is to try to stay in this moment and not get spun up by hypotheticals.

Staying present is the correct philosophy for me, but noting amazing flower blooms can only do so much. Life with internal bleeding, cancer, surgeries, chemical infusions, an out-of-balance gut, bacterial infections — even mundane COVID — is so damn hard.